Sorry guys that sentence is ment to be; drop your standeds and marry a non sda;

I have created a website so adventists can find others, there is another one, but after i read that they encouraged married men to join, so 'they could tell their single friends' I thought it was time we opened one

www.clubadventistcontact.com

God Speed...

I think there are exceptional cases to every scenario, in which a non-SDA spouse will become a SDA spouse however, that is more the exception than the rule.

It is also sad but true about marriages between two SDA spouses not working out, however, a SDA in name doesn't necessarily mean a SDA in spirit and in truth. That is why every potential spouse needs to be prayerfully considered.

I believe the counsel of Ellen G White is the best counsel to follow, and her counsel is in line with the Bible itself. She advocates long engagements to allow time to know whether or not he or she is the one for you.

Just my two pennies worth. My late father was never an SDA and only attended church for weddings & funerals. He generally agreed with most of the core SDA teachings and respected our Sabbath observance. He was also friends with our pastor and many of the members as we used to often attend the social evenings at the church hall after Sabbath. (He had grown up as a Dutch Reformed members in the Netherlands but only attended church as a kid because he was forced to.)

I think the problem would be when the one spouse is a devoted SDA and the other a devoted member of a other religion or other Sunday keeping Christian denomination.

My ex wife was a "light" duty SDA and although we attended church regularly we certainly didn't keep the Sabbath the way I was taught to and I believe that I did not set a good example. I must point out that this had nothing to do with the break up of our marriage and she was born again about two years before she passed away.

I have seen situations where the non SDA partner actually converts before or soon after marriage to an SDA. In most cases they seem to have been genuine conversions but I have seen cases where they were just conversions of convenience and the marriage has broken up after the "converted" spouse falls into apostasy.

I would preferably be involved with an SDA but I must say that the dating field seems somewhat limited in the congregations in my area.

With wisdom should come understanding. On that note, I would like to share some wisdom I have gained over the years. When you date, you date with the potential of a life long partner. For that reason alone, we must be aware of our truest desires of our potential partners. If having an SDA is important as a lifelong partner, then that is who one should date. Otherwise, you're investing in a stock that will not yield the results you desire.

But more importantly, than dating an SDA is dating a SDA Christian. There is a difference. Thanks for the open mind and listening ears.

Milagro,
Atlanta, GA

I can understand where most of you are coming from. When I was in college, I dated only Adventists, and boy, did I suffer for it! An SDA is NOT the same as an SDA Christian - just because he carries an SDA title does not make a man Godly or righteous. You must be careful. Do not date just because the person is SDA, date because that is where God is leading you.

After college, I stepped away from my faith for a short while and have dated one non-SDA person. Praise God, my husband converted shortly after our marriage - not out of convenience and not from any pressure from me or any of my family. I truly believe God brought us together, but I also believe that I jumped the gun and moved ahead of His leading. Mistakes made, lessons learned and sorrows earned.

Do I regret marrying my husband? Not on your life - it has been a struggle in many ways while he learns to be a Christian and an SDA, but we share the same beliefs, goals and dreams. He was openly seeking faith when we met and did not refuse it when God showed it to him.

You must follow God's leading when dating. Do I wish I had made different decisions when I met my husband, yes, many things we look back on now and wish we had done differently, but I also know and believe that God brought us together for this time and this purpose.

I have seen my parent's marriage disintegrate when my mother became SDA and I swore that would never happen to me. Remember that should you chose to marry outside your faith you take the risk that one day your spouse may chose to leave because the differences are too great.

I have found some good advice here - about dating SDA and enjoying the friendship of other singles.

Thanks.

I am glad to hear that.

to Maritime SDA OnLine.